Not All It's Cracked Up to Be

So...when I moved to Mexico I made some 'resolutions' - get healthier, lose weight, take better care of my skin; the regular stuff. Most have gone by the wayside - except taking care of my skin. Facials here are relatively cheap (around $30 for a full hour); so I resolved to go in once a month for a full facial. I've always had horrible skin texture - freckles - huge pores - constant breakouts. I figured it was time to invest some energy and money on my face - I want to avoid a face lift for as long as possible - although right now - I'm starting a savings account to pay for one.

Now you are probably saying to yourself "what a great deal, I'd do it in a heartbeat". You relax while some silent person massages you with lotions and oils...Right? Not so much. The first part is nice - rubbing, lotions, etc.; but when she moves the big magnifying light over my face and starts cleaning out my pores like she's mining for diamonds or something - I start to clench my fist, tears start rolling down my cheeks, my feet start twitching and I swear I'll never do it again. It's death by a thousand cuts. Not really painful at first - but as she works her way down to the tip of my nose; it's everything I can do not to headbutt the bitch.

I went religiously for about the first four months - then I started dreading them so much, I slipped and haven't been for about 3 months now - of course, every pore in my head was clogged - or so it seemed to the technician. Right now I'm at the "who gives a shit - I'm 65 years old for God's sake" stage, but I made another appointment anyway.

Conversation with the Plumber

Him: "Senora, I need to clean the screen on your faucet; do you have a old TEETH BRUSH?"
Me: "TEETH BRUSH?"
Him: "Yes, you know, for brushing the teeth, I need a teeth brush to clean this little screen. Do you have a old one?"
Me: "Oh you mean a TOOTHBRUSH, the correct word in English is TOOTHBRUSH."
Him: "Do Gringo's only brush one tooth at a time? That must be a lot of work."

When Money and Class Meet

I belong to the local little theater - they put on 6 shows a year and most are quite good. I usually work backstage in props or as a stage manager; it is all volunteers and a huge commitment since a production can take 2-3 months to put together. We are lucky here, we have a lot of retired professional and amateur actors so the shows are well attended.

I just finished working on a light comedy with a cast and crew of about 24. I've worked on several other shows, but this time everyone just clicked. It was a great group - lot's of work but a lot of fun.

Peter and Candace are a couple who moved down here from Boston last year and they immediately got involved with our theater. Peter was a doctor and Candace worked in a hospice back in the States. Lovely couple; she is tiny, blond, perfect hair...you know. Peter is a big Italian, loves to cook and entertain, always jovial and a perfect host.

Last night they invited all the cast and crew to their house for dinner - what a great party. Their house is gorgeous - great outside patios, beautiful pool with a waterfall, grand piano, fantastic kitchen with granite counters you could set up a bowling alley on...I have serious house envy. They had the food catered by these 2 guys who did Spanish Tapas.

I have been in a lot a homes down here - but I have to say Peter and Candace's place was the most inviting. I want them to adopt me!!